At the children’s LEGO Club yesterday, the theme was “At the Zoo”:
Kid #1: “I’m going to make an okapi enclosure.”
Kid #2: “I’ll tell you what I’m making after it’s done. At the orientation.”
Kid #3: “I’m making a skate park inside the zoo. For the giraffes.”
Kid #4: “Why are all the little people yellow? I can’t understand it.”
Kid #5: “There are some fake LEGOs mixed in. Would you like me to pick them out?”
I overheard a woman talking to her 4-year-old daughter on their way out the door.
Woman [gesturing at me]: “She works here, would you like to tell her?”
Daughter [looking up at me shyly, in a tiny voice]: “I wanted to say thank you very much for letting me use that computer over there. And for keeping the shelves very neat.”
A man and a woman were hovering around the desk nervously. After I offered to help, they cautiously approached.
Woman [whispering urgently]: “We really need to know if hemorrhoids are contagious.”
Patron: “Can you check the address on these library cards? I think the information is wrong. We live on Palm Street, but the cards say Main Street.”
Me: “That’s the address of the library.”
A lady walked up to me to ask for help making copies. She was in her 80s, very tall, and gaunt, with watery eyes and yellowed fingernails. I was talking with her about how many copies she needed when the following happened in very quick succession: 1) a dead housefly fell from her hair and landed on the folder she was holding, 2) she saw it and said “oops!”, 3) she scooped up the fly and popped it into her mouth, and 4) she told me she needed three double-sided copies.
Found in the IT Department.
Patron: “Is it okay if I leave my baby in the stroller over by the TV area?”
Me: “By himself?”
Patron: “Yes. I just need to run to the store.”
Me: “Um, no ma’am.”
Patron: “Which U.S. state is London, England in?”
A kid, running out of story time: “IS THIS THE BEST PLACE ON EARTH, OR WHAT?!”
While on the library’s roof checking for a leak, a library maintenance worker found a 2-liter bottle filled with water. Inside the bottle was a human tooth.
My library has a life-size statue of a man and a young girl sitting on a bench reading. Today while working at the reference desk, I witnessed a 4-year-old boy point at the statue and scream, “SHE HAS A VAGINA!”
The boy’s father could not contain his laughter.
A patron called and asked if we had any American Sign Language instructional audio books. I politely explained why we did not have any and why it might be difficult to locate one elsewhere.
On a table in the children’s library.
"Cinderella climb bean stalk she got stuck"
Overheard at the library.
Patron: “I can’t wait to see The Budapest Hotel. It’s the same guy who made Moonrise Sunrise and that Bill Murray one…the Zuzio Movie. Oh, and the Fabulous Fox! That one, haha, so good. I love everything that Wes Craven does.”